hello koolaid my old friend, ive come to drink with you again.  ahh koolaid, the quintessential summer drink. but, the question that remains on my part is – is it really summer?  the last month (july) was COLD and rainy. i can deal with rainy if i have to, but its summer. its july. its supposed to be in the high 80’s to somewhere in the 90’s.  not the 70’s like its been for the last several weeks. im losing my tan dammit.

now granted, due to my exercise program (i ROCK), i dont drink anything but water on a daily basis, its a great way to flush toxins and keep your skin fresh.  but…. i enjoy a glass of sweet tea or koolaid now and again and i’ve found that if i ignore the craving for too long, i over do it and thats not what my program is about. its about healthy living and regular exercise. ive already lost a nice chunk of weight since i joined in jan – to the point where i can take off a pair of jeans without unbuttoning or unzipping them. they slide right over my hips and butt so easily!  im so damn proud of myself.

im sorry ive been gone for so very long. i know some of you actually enjoy what i write – the socially unattractive life of jen lol but the last year + has been interesting to say the least and i just havent had it in me to write.  i started a new job last sept, working at a school and this is my first summer vacation in 30+ years.  i dont think i like it very much, i desperately need the routine.  going to the gym 3x a week helps tho.  im still a bipolar anxious panicy bitch but thanks to my paid best friend, im coping much better with it.  then again, due to extraordinary rx costs of my bipolar med, i had to half it.  its been a few months since i did that and i find i need the whole dose.  too much rapid cycling going on that messes up my head. so i’ll buck up and pay the extra money for the full dosage.  sigh my budget doesnt need this hit lol.

but – where the hell is summer?  we hardly had much of a spring – came late then got HOT (i love it).  june was lovely, in the pool several times a week working on my tan. but then, like i said above, then came the rain and chilly temps.  so much for global warming eh? what a joke.  but its going to be a gorgeous day today, sunny in the 80’s, yippee!!!  mebbe i’ll get the old man to take me for a putt when he gets home if he’s not too tired.  i worry about my beloved. he works so hard to take care of us so i treat him like a king.  waiting on him hand and foot is a true pleasure for me, because i get it back and after the hell ive been thru with men in my life, my beloved is a rare treasure.  he deserves to be a king.

on a truly wonderful note – my son, my most awesome and handsome son turned 22 yesterday. holy shit where the hell did the time go?  i remember my smiling blue eyed boy laughing and playing outside and miss that so much.  why do kids have to grow up?  but m’boy is in the army now – and i couldnt be more proud of him if i tried.  and im a damn proud army mom!!!  and if that aint the shit, my awesome minime will be 25 soon.  jesus.  brats looking at grad schools in fields i couldnt understand if i tried. that physics brain of hers will take her places.  she had a slight detour in her life plan, but i believe that was gods doing in that he took her out of potential harms way.  i doubt she see’s it that way, but its the only thing that makes sense to me.

ahhhh summertime. i do love it even though im not dealing with it well lol. cant wait to go back to school and ANYONE who’s known me for a very long time will be laughing their asses off at that statement considering i despise and hate school.  ive started a little flower garden out front of the hobbit house, my lavender is doing wonderfully and i just transplanted a baby bleeding heart out front. my basil is HUGE and i put my chicks and hens in a strawberry pot.  they’re thriving wonderfully and are hardy in zone 5 where i live. not bad for a cactus lol.  i lined part of the garden with purple and pink alyssum, such pretty plants.  got the ok from the landlord to put some plants in out back – a large bleeding heart and two white alyssums on either side.  i find im not that bad at growing plants.  next year i will put in annuals for color.

ahhh summertime – livins easy


damn i cant post the video now. oh well… click the link. janis is amazing live.